So far 2014 is shaping up to be a great year for us. I am super excited that we are back in routine. Routine is super important to our family. While I don't schedule things down to the minute we do have a fairly structured atmosphere. Personally I think its crucial to our family to function properly.
Our whole routine revolves around one thing and one thing only. SLEEP!!! If our sleep schedules are off, it throws all of us off and with that our routines. We have always taken pride in our kids' sleeping habits but as soon as our routine is messed up their sleeping habits get messed up. We are finally just getting all our sleep schedules back on track and we have been back into the swing of things now for three weeks. Often we get comments on our kids' sleep habits and how well they go to bed for us. I assure you we have worked hard to get where we are with their sleeping. We've been through bouts of sleep apnea and with that, all the sleepless nights. Having had four newborns so we have also been through all of that, also having the odd night where someone climbs into our bed. We are not perfect by any means.
Having 4 kids between 2 and 8 we have to adjust and we do so often. you have to take in account of the age their at, the behaviors that they have. Even look at yourself. Are you a night owl? An early riser? A late riser?
Nat is a night owl and can usually pull 5 to 7 hours of sleep and function well. For me I like to stay up late but I need an 8 hour minimum. I like to have 10 to 12 hours. I love sleep, I could sleep away days. J is what we like to call a normal kid. he needs 10 to 12 hours and often gets that. C is a lot like his dad. he only needs about 8 hours and because of this goes to bed at the same time as his siblings but is our early riser. K and N are our sleepers often (If able) pull 10 to 14 hours. There usually isn't a day where we have to wake one or both to go to school.
For us we have stuck to an earlier bed time. We start at 645 and often all kids are in bed asleep by 8. We have found that if we put them to bed at that time they sleep for their required amount of time and are refreshed and happy when they get up. If we put them to bed later they are still up at the same time and are in horrible moods.
With all four kids we did the cry out method. when I say that I don't mean we let them scream and scream and scream, we let them cry it out within reason. When we first started with each one it was heart breaking but I am so glad now we did it while they were babies and don't have to fight with an 8 year old now. When we started we started in 5 minute intervals and after 15 mins (3 - 5 minute intervals) we upped it to 10 minutes for 30 minutes (3- 10 minute intervals) I don't think we ever made it to 15 minute intervals.
Here's what we did. (By the way Nat is way better at this then me) Please Note: We found the best time to start this is at bed time about 630 -9 if their too tired it will not work.
Baby is crying (baby is fed, dry has soother but isn't wanting to sleep)
-go in at 5 min sooth, give soother blankie, rub back and reassure. Leave room and shut door. (DO NOT PICK UP BABY OR TURN LIGHT ON)
-When baby starts crying wait 5 mins and do it again. continue one more time
- If baby is still crying after you sooth after 5 min for 15 min increase time to 10 min
-let baby cry for 10 min go in sooth and repeat 3 times
Some babies are stubborn and it may take increasing to 15 min but after 15 we have found that going back down to 5 min intervals and repeating works best.
We are going through all of this at the moment with N again since switching her beds. It takes more time and effort when they get older since they have figured out how to push your buttons and how far they can go till you give in.
Even with our older kids we have to occasionally re enforce bed time. We get the "I need a drink" "I need to poop" and so on. The same goes to them. We give in 3 times then we get forceful. Yes you may have a drink, yes you can go poop, yes I love you. Now it is bed time! Then we start taking away privileges and add chores.If they are being super stubborn it usually just takes one privilege and one chore.
Bed time is a non negotiable for us and we have always made it clear. After bedtime its our time as parents, we need this time for us to be alone by ourselves or alone together.
